The Eternal Sunshine of John Mikel Obi

[Eaglezbeak]

If Mikel stays with Chelsea & they keep starting him he will not see any reason to improve he is happy to start & do what is expected,he hardly assists or scores but he does what's asked of him.

[Coach]

@Tx, commendation for the resilience, the unwavering hand holding the sword upright. To fall on the field of battle befits the field marshall, where as fleet shames him. As one attested to earlier, entering such debate t'is as futile an exercise as the premature ejaculator's contraction of pelvic floor muscles, as he peels his concubine out of her cotton coverings. Tell the Mayans their deitified totem poles were mere sticks and mud, would the reverence afforded such be renounced? John Obi is a national treasure, the spandex sporting Captain Nigeria, whose excellence and worldly repute, offers hope to the 100 odd million smurfs hounded by the Gargamel that is, everyday life.

In days of old, there was Jay Jay Okocha, a mercurial talent, a national pride restorer for a going nowhere nation. Jedi mind tricking his way through the Premiership, Okocha was more unifying than the bob, weave, overhand left and snappy right of Floyd 'Money' Mayweather. His throne remains unseated.

...The footballing diaspora, the opiate of the masses, have regressed in produce and performance. The fancy flicks, roly-polies, dragbacks, nutmegs, lost to the ages. There will never be another Okocha, but will forever be a need for codeines to accentuate the QALY.

...Martins flashed in the pan, Yakubu ate all in that very pan and Odemwingie skipped dinner to tweet about the aromas brownian motioning away from the kitchen. Far from that throne, but closer than all else is John Obi. 'Destroyed by the football coward', a Cyberian consensus. Destined for an Okocharian bloom till his path merged with that of Mourinhos. Nostalgia, a pine for the past. Truth be told, never did Obi show the reckless, ridiculous, swashbuckling, near suicidal swagger of Augustine the Great. Many eyes looked upon the Youth World Cup and danced atilogwu to the thoughts of a second coming. Watching Quincy Owusu grace that very same stage, one could've been forgiven for thinking Cruyff had been reborn, blacker than midnight, with more jheri curl than a hybrid of Robbynice and Daryl from Coming To America. #nooffenceintended.

...Nigeria needs its codeine, the masses thirst for their opiate, or rather obiate...cue glorious exaggeration and the tyrannous reign of unsubstantiation.

Obi is not Okocha and never will be. The immediate retort of the masses is, to how many Promised Lands did the ball juggling, banana shooting, madness of Igwe Okocha guide us? Of course, with the very same mouth, Mourinho is chastised for the conservatism that is John Obi, ironically. A better player for Nigeria than he is for Chelsea, but the return for the former could be better. The fault of the players around him, as the return domestically, is the fault of the coaches around him. For want of relativity, in a freer role clad in the gorgeous green, playing against inferior opposition, by and large, the Ngugis, the Selassies, the Frankie Fredericks and the bleached haired Sisqo kids...it would not be in breach of Cyberian legislation to suggest that 'the return could be better'. But...

All that bounces in the kangaroo's court.

Twas foolish of you to engage in such debate and whilst one enjoyed the finest sleep, with the sweetest of dreams that would send a diabetic into ketoacidosis...more bubble's than a Kash n Karry rant+rave doused in mild green Fairy liquid, yours was a night of long knives and slash wounds.

...TIA, 'this is Africa', a diamond mine pillaging Di Caprio once chimed in role, to a backdrop of severed limbs falling to the floor, 'shor sleef or lon sleef'. TIC brethren, 'This Is Cyberia'. Let it resonate between the eustachians and percuss the tympanic membrane, John Obi is better than Busquets. Playing as a deep-lying midfielder, he trumps Yaya in the same position. As a creative midfielder on the national stage, he pips the gentle giant when asked to do the same for The Elephants.

...The question need not ask of Sergio Busquets, but rather, the game in its entirety. Is there a midfielder in world football better than John Obi?

Not only does Yootoob show King John 'schooling' Xavi and Iniesta for 90 minutes, but it does so with a side salad and relish that would steam the lenses of Heston's oversized glasses, Burna Boys - Run My Race. Even the music dey for video better pass Iniesta's.

Consensus must read that, Busquets is not fit to drink milk from Xabi Alonso's hirsuit breast...Obi is better than Alonso. Fact. Sauce: Yootoob 'Chocolata - Omawumi'

Once Spain open yansh next summer, the Spanish fly will lose its Cupid-like capacity to win all hearts and minds. The world will wake from its slumber and see how overrated all of these swollen headed Iniestas and 'in need of a Gillette Mach 3' Ramos' are. The World Cup will come and upon its conclusion, the coronation of King John, will centre-piece the closing ceremony. Tx, there is little one can do to stop the gravy train, roast some potatoes and dip them in the spillages. #delicious.

Wtf does any of this mean? No f*cking idea. The defence rests your Honour.

[metalalloy]

Txj has been "Analyzed" and deconstructed.

The main problem is that in his mind it is IMPOSSIBLE to be wrong. Its his POV or nothing. This has been quite the read sha..

[txj]

And why is he a poor long range shooter after 6 years?

The goals as well as assists show a fuller range of a player's game than mere 5 meter passes.

Makelele only had two goals at CFC; but does he have the full range of talent that Mikel has?

The problem with you is the tendency to think only in tangents!

How is it that N'Zonzi can score from long range shots and Mikel cannot after 6 years?

And you can offer such a pathetic excuse with a straight face?

Ehmm!! is it not the same 5 meter passes that the busquet video was showing..
Makalele's talent/strength was somewhere else..

Players are born with one natural talent/skill set or the other..

I guess you train everyday with Mikel to know why he is a poor long range shooter and he does not practice... You cannot be blessed with every thing.. No player is perfect... mata cannot shoot properly with his right foot, took DD time to work on his close ball control, Luiz takes wicked FK that JT cannot, Scholes after a decade plus cannot tackle, ashle COle still cannot put in a peach of a cross neither can Ivanovic, Ramires cannot control the ball like a true brazilian..... No player is perfect.. Coaches know this hence why they look for ways players varying skills can compliment each other..
in the same 6 yrs that mikel is finding it difficult to improve on his shooting, he has significantly improved on his reading of the game, his defending, tackling, positioning, reduced number of cards he picks up.. Interesting, you don't see that at all..

I see all that. But unlike you I also see a player who does not do much more, when he has the talent to. That's the difference between us. Where you are forever making excuses and tired justifications, I highlight massive unused potential.


yes i love thinking in tangents because I dont subscribe to your line of reasoning.. You come here acting like you are the only one that has a working brain.. Like others can't view things differently with accompanying logic.. Get off your high horse.. You are not the "truth" when it comes to assessing football related topics.. All you have is an opinion, albeit not an expert one.. No different from anyone else on this forum.

1 + 1 = 2.. Nzonzi can shoot significantly better than Mikel hence Nzonzi is a superior player because concluding by your logic he can do that one thing Mikel can't.. Case closed.. Nzonzi for WPOY.. yay!!!!

Talking about brains, the math analogy says a lot. Where u can only comprehend a linear relationship, I actually presented N'Zonzi as a metaphor. A player of VASTLY inferior talent who is maximizing the little he has as compared to one who as a youth was ranked second only to Messi!!

Can Mikel improve his shooting? Sure... Will hope he keeps working on it.. But dont make that a center piece for your argument.. That is very very weak..

The poor shooting is symptomatic of the player's entire career progression in that it has remained poor after six years. It maybe a little thing, but it captures the central issue in my argument- that a player with massive abilities appears content to simply be where he is. It is testimony to that great tangential brain power of yours that the analogy is lost on you...
Will take my unilateral tangent thinking self to bed.. This is getting tedious..

[txj]

@Tx, commendation for the resilience, the unwavering hand holding the sword upright. To fall on the field of battle befits the field marshall, whereas fleet shames him. As one attested to earlier, entering such debate t'is as futile an exercise as the premature ejaculator's contraction of pelvic floor muscles, as he peels his concubine out of her cotton coverings. Tell the Mayans their deitified totem poles were mere sticks and mud, would the reverence afforded such be renounced? John Obi is a national treasure, the spandex sporting Captain Nigeria, whose excellence and worldly repute, offers hope to the 100 odd million smurfs hounded by the gargamel that is, everyday life.

In days of old, there was Jay Jay Okocha, a mercurial talent, a national pride restorer for a going nowhere nation. Jedi mind tricking his way through the Premiership, Okocha was more unifying than the bob, weave, overhand left and snappy right of Floyd 'Money' Mayweather. His throne remains unseated.

...The footballing diaspora, the opiate of the masses, have regressed in produce and performance. The fancy flicks, roly-polies, dragbacks, nutmegs, lost to the ages. There will never be another Okocha, but will forever be a need for codeines to accentuate the QALY.

...Martins flashed in the pan, Yakubu ate all in that very pan and Odemwingie skipped dinner to tweet about the aromas brownian motioning away from the kitchen. Far from that throne, but closer than all else is John Obi. 'Destroyed by the football coward', a Cyberian consensus. Destined for an Okocharian bloom till his path merged with that of Mourinhos. Nostalgia, a pine for the past. Truth be told, never did Obi show the reckless, ridiculous, swashbuckling, near suicidal swagger of Augustine the Great. Many eyes looked upon the Youth World Cup and danced atilogwu to the thoughts of a second coming. Watching Quincy Owusu grace that very same stage, one could've been forgiven for thinking Cruyff had been reborn, blacker than midnight, with more jheri curl than a hybrid of Robbynice and Daryl from Coming To America. #nooffenceintended.

...Nigeria needs its codeine, the masses thirst for their opiate, or rather obiate...cue glorious exaggeration and the tyrannous reign of unsubstantiation.

Obi is not Okocha and never will be. The immediate retort of the masses is, to how many Promised Lands did the ball juggling, banana shooting, madness of Igwe Okocha guide us? Of course, with the very same mouth, Mourinho is chastised for the conservatism that is John Obi, ironically. A better player for Nigeria than he is for Chelsea, but the return for the former could be better. The fault of the players around him, as the return domestically, is the fault of the coaches around him. For want of relativity, in a freer role clad in the gorgeous green, playing against inferior opposition, by and large, the Ngugis, the Selassies, the Frankie Fredericks and the bleached haired Sisqo kids...it would not be in breach of Cyberian legislation to suggest that one 'the return could be better'. But...

All that bounces in the kangaroo's court.

Twas foolish of you to engage in such debate and whilst one enjoyed the finest sleep, with the sweetest of dreams that would send a diabetic into ketoacidosis...more bubble's than a Kash n Karry rant+rave doused in mild green Fairy liquid, yours was a night of long knives and slash wounds.

...TIA, 'this is Africa', a diamond mine pillaging Di Caprio once chimed in role, to a backdrop of severed limbs falling to the floor, 'shor sleef or lon sleef'. TIC brethren, 'This Is Cyberia'. Let it resonate between the eustachians and percuss the tympanic membrane, John Obi is better than Busquets. Playing as a deep-lying midfielder, he trumps Yaya in the same position. As a creative midfielder on the national stage, he pips the gentle giant when asked to do the same for The Elephants.

...The question need not ask of Sergio Busquets, but rather, the game in its entirety. Is there a midfielder in world football better than John Obi?

Not only does Yootoob show King John 'schooling' Xavi and Iniesta for 90 minutes, but it does so with a side salad and relish that would steam the lenses of Heston's oversized glasses, Burna Boys - Run My Race. Even the music dey for video better pass Iniesta's.

Consensus must read that, Busquets is not fit to drink milk from Xabi Alonso's hirsuit breast...Obi is better than Alonso. Fact. Sauce: Yootoob 'Chocolata - Omawumi'

Once Spain open yansh next summer, the Spanish fly will lose its Cupid-like capacity to win all hearts and minds. The world will wake from its slumber and see how overrated all of these swollen headed Iniestas and 'in need of a Gillette Mach 3' Ramos' are. The World Cup will come and upon its conclusion, the coronation of King John, will centre-piece the closing ceremony. Tx, there is little one can do to stop the gravy train, roast some potatoes and dip them in the spillages. #delicious.

Wtf does any of this mean? No f*cking idea. The defence rests your Honour.

As the 'great' Sarah Palin says, only dead fish go with the flow...

[analyzer]

Txj,
I take it you slept well.. Have you revisited your math on if Busquet still managed half of Mikel's total EPL assist in 2012 of was it season 2012/2013. Or you were just being metaphoric

I am no longer interested in your tomfoolery..
For the record, hardly anyone claimed to be satisfied with Mikel's progress. Most (me included) believe there is room for improvement. But when you start pulling all sort of bogus claims and stats to score cheap points, it weakens your own argument and turned this thread into an absolute joke.

The thread stands as evidence for all to decide who was using their brain power.. I am happy with my tangential reasoning especially in using it to debunk your poorly put together and irrational claims.

You and coach can continue your Kumbaya since both of you are the only live fishes in the pond.. smh!!

[The YeyeMan]

Mikel is a very good player and nobody can say he's underachieved in his career. He has won just about all there is to win at club level and has an international trophy too. He's played his role, doing the simple things very well, in successful Chelsea teams over the years.

Has he maximised his potential? No.

Dennis Bergkamp has just published his autobiography where he writes about what marks out the truly great players. The efforts they go to in order to improve their game, the extra training and the ambition: "You climb one mountain and see a higher one."

Mikel is seemingly content with what he has become as a player. His talent can't be questioned and he has the trophies which point to a successful career. His mindset, however, can be called into question. But I don't think he'll have any regrets once his career is over. He's played his career very safe so far - very much like his games for Chelsea.

It's worth reading up on the Bergkamp book:
http://www.theguardian.com/football/201 ... -love-game

[Bigpokey24]

you have destroyed them both... kai, me i no go wahala you at all

Txj,
I take it you slept well.. Have you revisited your math on if Busquet still managed half of Mikel's total EPL assist in 2012 of was it season 2012/2013. Or you were just being metaphoric

I am no longer interested in your tomfoolery..
For the record, hardly anyone claimed to be satisfied with Mikel's progress. Most (me included) believe there is room for improvement. But when you start pulling all sort of bogus claims and stats to score cheap points, it weakens your own argument and turned this thread into an absolute joke.

The thread stands as evidence for all to decide who was using their brain power.. I am happy with my tangential reasoning especially in using it to debunk your poorly put together and irrational claims.

You and coach can continue your Kumbaya since both of you are the only live fishes in the pond.. smh!!

[cchinukw]

Someone tell me why I'm suddenly thinking of the rumble in the jungle.

[Coach]

Rumble, the sound of the thick, lazy Sasquatch's kwashiokored stomach's cry for nourishment. Jungle, three-toed foot prints blemish the soil, highly suggestive of a simian presence.

[txj]

Mikel is a very good player and nobody can say he's underachieved in his career. He has won just about all there is to win at club level and has an international trophy too. He's played his role, doing the simple things very well, in successful Chelsea teams over the years.

Has he maximised his potential? No.

Dennis Bergkamp has just published his autobiography where he writes about what marks out the truly great players. The efforts they go to in order to improve their game, the extra training and the ambition: "You climb one mountain and see a higher one."

Mikel is seemingly content with what he has become as a player. His talent can't be questioned and he has the trophies which point to a successful career. His mindset, however, can be called into question. But I don't think he'll have any regrets once his career is over. He's played his career very safe so far - very much like his games for Chelsea.

It's worth reading up on the Bergkamp book:
http://www.theguardian.com/football/201 ... -love-game

Thank you!

In all the brouhaha and chest thumping about google searching ability, what you wrote above is the very essence of the article.

We have a top, top talent, who has done well for his club and won trophies. But in football, as Bergkamp (I hope to read his book soon) noted, you have to have the ambition to be the best you can be. That's what defines the greats.

While for some, having 6 assists in six years, starting for Chelsea is all they can see, I see more. I see a player who as an U-20, in a tournament with Cesc and David Silva, he was 2nd only to Messi..

[txj]

Mikel is a very good player and nobody can say he's underachieved in his career. He has won just about all there is to win at club level and has an international trophy too. He's played his role, doing the simple things very well, in successful Chelsea teams over the years.

Has he maximised his potential? No.

Dennis Bergkamp has just published his autobiography where he writes about what marks out the truly great players. The efforts they go to in order to improve their game, the extra training and the ambition: "You climb one mountain and see a higher one."

Mikel is seemingly content with what he has become as a player. His talent can't be questioned and he has the trophies which point to a successful career. His mindset, however, can be called into question. But I don't think he'll have any regrets once his career is over. He's played his career very safe so far - very much like his games for Chelsea.

It's worth reading up on the Bergkamp book:
http://www.theguardian.com/football/201 ... -love-game

You might want to know:

A few years ago I was part of a football discussion on players and unfulfilled potential.

Somebody brought up Kanu.

I proceeded to speak to them about him using the Olympics final game as a reference point. How he dropped into central midfield and proceeded to redefine the game.

My point was that this was a player primed to be WPOY, but for the unfortunate heart problem.

Yes, he still went on to do great things, won titles and all, but he was never the same.

To those whom much is given, much is expected...

Starting with my debates on this issue with G4L, I've always been clear about Mikel's abilities and how well he has held his own at Chlesea, in the narrowly defined role.

Its never been about what he is, its about what he could've been...

[Coach]

@Yeyeman, by name and nature evidently...obvious your dial-up internet of 1gb monthly allowance, doesn't allow the viewing of Youtube's most virulent video, Run My Race - Burna Boy. On that very pitch, men who've climbed all the Bergkampian mountains to master their art, Iniesta, Xavi, Busquets et al, were schooled by the Dean of Midfielders...For the full ninety, might one add. Obi has added goals to his game, vs Uruguay, for Chelsea the other week...hit the post in training yesterday sauce: Chelseatv.com. This season he'll get atleast 5 league goals. What more can be demanded?

@Tx, at the Worlds Youth Cup, he was second to Messi and all things considered, is still holding the same fort. Name a midfielder in world football better, with substantiating evidence, as opposed to emotions. Schweinsteiger? Nope, all vowels and consonants, Obi had him on lock when they met. Playing the Xavi role vs Spain, Obi was the better of the two. Playing the Yaya role vs Cote D'Ivoire, Obi came out trumps. When talking of assists, lest we forget his throughballs were feeding a low self-esteemed Fernando Torres.

[Cellular]

Txj has been "Analyzed" and deconstructed.

The main problem is that in his mind it is IMPOSSIBLE to be wrong. Its his POV or nothing. This has been quite the read sha..

You are just not smart enough to see the emperor's magnificent garment...

[Coach]

^atleast the Emperor's wearing one, others have removed the loin cloth and blame the viewers eyes for sighting their manhood.

[metalalloy]

^atleast the Emperor's wearing one, others have removed the loin cloth and blame the viewers eyes for sighting their manhood.

is he?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Empero ... ew_Clothes

[Coach]

@Metal, the people didn't look close enough, the cloak was fantastic! The colours, the cottons, cashmire, silk...others don't deny their nakedness.

[odi]

Analyzer, if we ever meet eh, I too promise as many bottles of beer as you want!

See how you have totally schooled txj, choi! The man is just moving goalpost up and down... doesn't know where to hide... embarrassing and pathetic.
First he was talking about Busquets (some nonsense about being the reference for DMs), and after you wired him with stats, he shifted the goalposts to talk about Carrick and other midfielders in EPL!

This is called cyber flogging!

[mastermind]

Apart from Yaya, Mikel is the only African starting as a DM in a top 10 club in the world. If that is not an achievement I do not know what it is. Mikel play to the instructions of the coach, and as a DM he's got to do his job and show maturity, but in the national team he's got more freedom. We saw what he did to the spanish team @ the confed cup. The almighty Messi hasn't won anything for Argie @ the senior level yet, but our own Mikel has done it. He has won it all and his career is already a sucess, I hope he wins the AFY.

[Bigpokey24]

the worst part was the inclusion of Oliseh

Analyzer, if we ever meet eh, I too promise as many bottles of beer as you want!

See how you have totally schooled txj, choi! The man is just moving goalpost up and down... doesn't know where to hide... embarrassing and pathetic.
First he was talking about Busquets (some nonsense about being the reference for DMs), and after you wired him with stats, he shifted the goalposts to talk about Carrick and other midfielders in EPL!

This is called cyber flogging!

[Cellular]

^atleast the Emperor's wearing one, others have removed the loin cloth and blame the viewers eyes for sighting their manhood.

"The Emperor's New Clothes" (Danish: Kejserens nye Klæder) is a short tale by Hans Christian Andersen about two weavers who promise an Emperor a new suit of clothes that is invisible to those unfit for their positions, stupid, or incompetent. When the Emperor parades before his subjects in his new clothes, a child cries out, "But he isn't wearing anything at all!"

[Bigpokey24]

^atleast the Emperor's wearing one, others have removed the loin cloth and blame the viewers eyes for sighting their manhood.

"The Emperor's New Clothes" (Danish: Kejserens nye Klæder) is a short tale by Hans Christian Andersen about two weavers who promise an Emperor a new suit of clothes that is invisible to those unfit for their positions, stupid, or incompetent. When the Emperor parades before his subjects in his new clothes, a child cries out, "But he isn't wearing anything at all!"

[Coach]

@Celluminati, that child was Big Pokey mistaking the manhood for ripe banana. A fully qualified cretin...Case officially closed.