Dele Alli - What's gone wrong.

[kbt]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/66187943

Dele Alli: Everton midfielder says he was sexually abused aged six

Everton midfielder Dele Alli says he was sexually abused when he was six years old.

In an emotional interview with former England footballer Gary Neville, Alli revealed the abused he suffered as a child before he was adopted aged 12.

He said he was "molested" aged six, started smoking aged seven and was dealing drugs at eight years old.

Alli, 27, recently spent six weeks in rehab because of a sleeping pill addiction and mental health issues.

One of football's brightest young talents, Alli was part of the England squad that reached the semi-finals of the 2018 World Cup and helped Tottenham reach the Champions League final in 2019.

However, his form dipped and he left Spurs to join Everton in February 2022 before going on a loan spell to Turkish side Besiktas last season.

Alli, who earned the last of his 37 England caps in 2019, returned to Everton at the end of last season because of injury.

"When I came back from Turkey, I found out I needed an operation and I was in a bad place mentally," he told The Overlap.

"I decided to go to a modern day rehab facility for mental health. They deal with addiction, mental health and trauma.

"I felt like it was time for me. With things like that, you can't be told to go there. You have to know and make the decision yourself or it's not going to work. I was caught in a bad cycle. I was relying on things that were doing me harm.

"I was waking up every day and I was winning the fight going into training, smiling, showing that I was happy but inside I was definitely losing the battle. It was time for me to change it."

Alli said he had come out of rehab three weeks ago and "could never have imagined how much" he would get from it as "a lot happened when I was younger that I could never understand and figure out" and it had helped him on that front.

He later talked about being "molested" at six before being "sent to Africa to learn discipline".

"At seven, I started smoking, eight I started dealing drugs," he added.

"An older person told me that they wouldn't stop a kid on a bike, so I rode around with my football, and then underneath I'd have the drugs. That was eight.

"Eleven, I was hung off a bridge by a guy from the next estate, a man.

"Twelve, I was adopted - and from then, it was like - I was adopted by an amazing family like I said, I couldn't have asked for better people to do what they'd done for me. If God created people, it was them."

More to follow.

[danfo driver]

His mother destroyed him. His poor father tried to salvage what was left by bringing him home to train him properly.

[airwolex]

Mehn, this boy has gone through a lot. Wish him all the best.

[airwolex]

I am kind of lost but let me try to make sure I understand your guys well. You want someone whose Father abandoned him to go Anna make peace with that said Father?

His father never abandoned him! His head was turned by his foster parents when he returned to the UK to continue with his football career. It's all on the internet, do some research before stereotyping Dele's father.
Why do you think some are urging him to reach out to his father?

Maybe, but he felt abandoned in his mind.

[Bigpokey24]

Mehn, this boy has gone through a lot. Wish him all the best.

likewise.. praying he gets back to his best

[danfo driver]

I am kind of lost but let me try to make sure I understand your guys well. You want someone whose Father abandoned him to go Anna make peace with that said Father?

His father never abandoned him! His head was turned by his foster parents when he returned to the UK to continue with his football career. It's all on the internet, do some research before stereotyping Dele's father.
Why do you think some are urging him to reach out to his father?

Maybe, but he felt abandoned in his mind.

You are digging because of your ego. You dont want to admit the truth facing you. "He felt abandoned in his mind." After his drug dealer mother ruined his life, his father took him in, brought him to Lagos to try to help him. After he went back to the UK and joined gangs, and even after he got adopted by the white family, his Dad continued to invite him and bring him to the United States, so he can spend time with his Dad and his half siblings.

Set your ego aside and deal with facts!

Dele should go and do the needful. Reach out to your father and apologize. All will be well, thereafter.

[balo]

All the best to Dele. I hope he gets professional and familial help so he can be back to being a wholesome person to himself and his community.

[Coach]

Tragic. Would be interesting to know the circumstances that brought him back to the UK and in whose custody. Very, very sad. As traumatic a childhood, in it’s entirety, as his was, there should be no shortage of feathers in his cap for what he’s made of his life and the godsends (in his own words) who stepped forward and offered proper parenting.

[Bigpokey24]

[aruako1]

Sad story. I wish him the best. Dele's father probably meant well but he wasn't there when he faced his trauma. Children need their parents.

[Damunk]

Really tragic.
Mental ill-health is a biatch.

Imagine being “hung from a bridge” as a child!

[Damunk]

I am kind of lost but let me try to make sure I understand your guys well. You want someone whose Father abandoned him to go Anna make peace with that said Father?

His father never abandoned him! His head was turned by his foster parents when he returned to the UK to continue with his football career. It's all on the internet, do some research before stereotyping Dele's father.
Why do you think some are urging him to reach out to his father?

Dele Alli: ”They can say what they like…”
Be careful what you read on the internet.

[aruako1]

I am kind of lost but let me try to make sure I understand your guys well. You want someone whose Father abandoned him to go Anna make peace with that said Father?

His father never abandoned him! His head was turned by his foster parents when he returned to the UK to continue with his football career. It's all on the internet, do some research before stereotyping Dele's father.
Why do you think some are urging him to reach out to his father?

Dele Alli: ”They can say what they like…”
Be careful what you read on the internet.

If he was close enough to his son the foster parents wouldn't have "turned his head". His father should have been there for him especially when he knew that Dele's mother was an alcoholic.

Even if the woman did not want him to see his child he should have fought very hard for his son. If he didn't have a visa, he would have qualified for one.

Dele's father's twin lives in the UK. His father could have obtained an order for Dele to live with his uncle given his mother's alcoholism. Nobody should go through the trauma that boy had to endure.

[Damunk]

I am kind of lost but let me try to make sure I understand your guys well. You want someone whose Father abandoned him to go Anna make peace with that said Father?

His father never abandoned him! His head was turned by his foster parents when he returned to the UK to continue with his football career. It's all on the internet, do some research before stereotyping Dele's father.
Why do you think some are urging him to reach out to his father?

Dele Alli: ”They can say what they like…”
Be careful what you read on the internet.

If he was close enough to his son the foster parents wouldn't have "turned his head". His father should have been there for him especially when he knew that Dele's mother was an alcoholic.

Even if the woman did not want him to see his child he should have fought very hard for his son. If he didn't have a visa, he would have qualified for one.

Dele's father's twin lives in the UK. His father could have obtained an order for Dele to live with his uncle given his mother's alcoholism. Nobody should go through the trauma that boy had to endure.

This is all from afar. Analysing things from a mature, responsible and stable perspective.
The point is, not every Nigerian has those qualities at a younger age.

You know stories, I know stories of Nigerian men that have done things we would never ever contemplate doing.
We just don’t know the dynamics of the relationship at the time.

[danfo driver]

I am kind of lost but let me try to make sure I understand your guys well. You want someone whose Father abandoned him to go Anna make peace with that said Father?

His father never abandoned him! His head was turned by his foster parents when he returned to the UK to continue with his football career. It's all on the internet, do some research before stereotyping Dele's father.
Why do you think some are urging him to reach out to his father?

Dele Alli: ”They can say what they like…”
Be careful what you read on the internet.

If he was close enough to his son the foster parents wouldn't have "turned his head". His father should have been there for him especially when he knew that Dele's mother was an alcoholic.

Even if the woman did not want him to see his child he should have fought very hard for his son. If he didn't have a visa, he would have qualified for one.

Dele's father's twin lives in the UK. His father could have obtained an order for Dele to live with his uncle given his mother's alcoholism. Nobody should go through the trauma that boy had to endure.

You are a very funny guy. Reading your comments, you are very delusional, and certainly do not know how things work in the real world. In fact, I think you actually know how things work, but you are a very dishonest person. Thats the problem.

Anyway, Dele knows what to do to get his life back on track.

[danfo driver]

I am kind of lost but let me try to make sure I understand your guys well. You want someone whose Father abandoned him to go Anna make peace with that said Father?

His father never abandoned him! His head was turned by his foster parents when he returned to the UK to continue with his football career. It's all on the internet, do some research before stereotyping Dele's father.
Why do you think some are urging him to reach out to his father?

Dele Alli: ”They can say what they like…”
Be careful what you read on the internet.

Dele, himself, can also say what he likes. In the end, he will have to go to America to kneel down to get things back on track. Simple as that.

[packerland]

I am kind of lost but let me try to make sure I understand your guys well. You want someone whose Father abandoned him to go Anna make peace with that said Father?

His father never abandoned him! His head was turned by his foster parents when he returned to the UK to continue with his football career. It's all on the internet, do some research before stereotyping Dele's father.
Why do you think some are urging him to reach out to his father?

Dele Alli: ”They can say what they like…”
Be careful what you read on the internet.

Dele, himself, can also say what he likes. In the end, he will have to go to America to kneel down to get things back on track. Simple as that.

You sound like you have a personal vendetta against him. You think years of trauma can be washed away by kneeling down & begging. Imagine if Dele was your estranged son and you found out he was molested all this while. With this new reevaluation, this is the perfect time for his dad to reach out to him. The dad is well-off and Dele is at his lowest (personally and professionally) so no one can say his dad reaching out to share his fame.

[packerland]

We don’t know why this boy cut off from his father even though his dad from all indications would’ve been the socially accepted parent to have had custody of him. Maybe Dele told his dad about the molestation and he told him to shake it off or maybe in Dele’s head he was mad at his dad for marrying a second wife and just wanted his dad to be with his crackhead mom. We know that’s not reasonable but kids love fantasy.

[danfo driver]

I am kind of lost but let me try to make sure I understand your guys well. You want someone whose Father abandoned him to go Anna make peace with that said Father?

His father never abandoned him! His head was turned by his foster parents when he returned to the UK to continue with his football career. It's all on the internet, do some research before stereotyping Dele's father.
Why do you think some are urging him to reach out to his father?

Dele Alli: ”They can say what they like…”
Be careful what you read on the internet.

Dele, himself, can also say what he likes. In the end, he will have to go to America to kneel down to get things back on track. Simple as that.

You sound like you have a personal vendetta against him. You think years of trauma can be washed away by kneeling down & begging. Imagine if Dele was your estranged son and you found out he was molested all this while. With this new reevaluation, this is the perfect time for his dad to reach out to him. The dad is well-off and Dele is at his lowest (personally and professionally) so no one can say his dad reaching out to share his fame.

You talk too much nonsense. This is why you could not find a job and had to remain in school to keep your visa.

[danfo driver]

We don’t know why this boy cut off from his father even though his dad from all indications would’ve been the socially accepted parent to have had custody of him. Maybe Dele told his dad about the molestation and he told him to shake it off or maybe in Dele’s head he was mad at his dad for marrying a second wife and just wanted his dad to be with his crackhead mom. We know that’s not reasonable but kids love fantasy.

With all your pretend-education, your lack of knowledge and intelligence shows why you couldnt secure employment. You think a court will hand over custody of a British citizen to a non-citizen parent who has no intention of living in Britain?

[packerland]

We don’t know why this boy cut off from his father even though his dad from all indications would’ve been the socially accepted parent to have had custody of him. Maybe Dele told his dad about the molestation and he told him to shake it off or maybe in Dele’s head he was mad at his dad for marrying a second wife and just wanted his dad to be with his crackhead mom. We know that’s not reasonable but kids love fantasy.

With all your pretend-education, your lack of knowledge and intelligence shows why you couldnt secure employment. You think a court will hand over custody of a British citizen to a non-citizen parent who has no intention of living in Britain?

You are exposing your ignorance. I’m looking at UK laws and it is saying it’s possible for the following reasons:
1. He’s the biological father
2. He is unsafe living with the mother

I won’t do your homework for you.

[danfo driver]

We don’t know why this boy cut off from his father even though his dad from all indications would’ve been the socially accepted parent to have had custody of him. Maybe Dele told his dad about the molestation and he told him to shake it off or maybe in Dele’s head he was mad at his dad for marrying a second wife and just wanted his dad to be with his crackhead mom. We know that’s not reasonable but kids love fantasy.

With all your pretend-education, your lack of knowledge and intelligence shows why you couldnt secure employment. You think a court will hand over custody of a British citizen to a non-citizen parent who has no intention of living in Britain?

You are exposing your ignorance. I’m looking at UK laws and it is saying it’s possible for the following reasons:
1. He’s the biological father
2. He is unsafe living with the mother

I won’t do your homework for you.

Yen yen yen ... Secure employment first.

[danfo driver]

One thing you can trust Nigerians on is that if you are a Nigerian, they will join hands together to bury you! Does it surprise any of you that one of the few (if not the only) times Nigerians work together with unity and support, is when a "thief" is caught and a large group of Nigerians put tires around him to burn and murder him???? You can trust Nigerians on that! When its time do destroy a fellow Nigerian, they stand up!

I am supporting Kenny Alli, not only because his story has been consistent from the first day, but also:

1. parents make mistakes;
2. most parents (even the bad ones) usually act in the best interest of their children (AS THEY SEE IT).
3. People remember things from their own perspective (Dele may not be wrong, but doesnt mean his parents were wrong) - Dele said he was sent to Nigeria for discipline. His father's family said its a lie. It could be that in the UK, under his Mom's roof, he was permitted to do whatever he likes. But when his dad took him to Nigeria, his dad had boundaries and brought him up like the way we were all brought up.

Dele also spoke about drinking, smoking and being hung from a bridge. These are not good for a child, but I am astounded at the Nigerians here who are wailing and blaming his parents. I had friends in JSS2 in Nigeria who were smoking, drinking and fighting.. there was no bridge to hang anyone from, but I know the assss whooping some got. You want to pretend you didnt see this when you were 11, 12, 13?

4.. When you have a child with a woman, with whom you are no longer in a relationship, it becomes very hard. Not to speak of (i) a white woman; (ii) a citizen, when you are not; (iii) a woman in a different country.

Number 4 is very important when you hear Kenny's story over and over again. I am going to post the story that an Alli family member just told -- and its literally the same story Kenny has been telling for years. But many Nigerians who have a black hole in their heart, who are wicked and afraid to criticize the white parent who had Dele in her custody, and want to tarnish the image of a fellow Nigerian -- who has raised 4 other children who have all turned out to be upstanding children.