Erling Haaland

[Coach]

2-1, most dangerous lead in the business. City desperately need Ogbunigwe to show its easy peasy. Surely a brace atleast. Home fixture.

[Scipio Africanus]

2-1, most dangerous lead in the business. City desperately need Ogbunigwe to show its easy peasy. Surely a brace atleast. Home fixture.

Another Brighton goal more likely. It is pre ordained.

[Coach]

Cherry picking, not so easy peasy. Off at the half mark, rough and tumble. Meanwhile, Jeremy “straighteners” Doku, serving it up to all comers.

[Coach]

Elsewhere, Der Ogbunigwe, Harrison “Amandianeze” Kane.

Dortmund hattricked.

[danfo driver]

HE CAME, HE SAW AND HE DESTROYED THE WEAK LEAGUE! TUFIA! NEVER SEEN A LEAGUE SO POROUS AND EASY FOR A PLAYER!

ERLING HAALAND, THE BEST STRIKER TO PLAY IN THE EPL.

Truly shameful, considering the guy couldnt do this in Norway, Austria and Germany. And struggles in International Football, as well. But once it comes to EPL, he destroys them!

[kalani JR]

HE CAME, HE SAW AND HE DESTROYED THE WEAK LEAGUE! TUFIA! NEVER SEEN A LEAGUE SO POROUS AND EASY FOR A PLAYER!

ERLING HAALAND, THE BEST STRIKER TO PLAY IN THE EPL.

Truly shameful, considering the guy couldnt do this in Norway, Austria and Germany. And struggles in International Football, as well. But once it comes to EPL, he destroys them!

Andy Cole has perhaps the most underrated/understated career.

[Coach]

Too easy to score against and sadly, Erlingbunigwe not making as much of a difference second time around.

Meanwhile, Harrison Ogbuefi Kane, treating the Bundesliga accordingly.

[Sleaky72]

Too easy to score against and sadly, Erlingbunigwe not making as much of a difference second time around.

Meanwhile, Harrison Ogbuefi Kane, treating the Bundesliga accordingly.

Lol you couldn’t help yourself

[Coach]

Needed desperately at Villa Park to stem the tide. Currently being peppered more than a Nandos chicken, extra hot, Vusa sauce? Aye, aye Cap’n.

[Coach]

Dougie Luiz chalked off by VAR. Rightly. City looking like they came for a point. The vanishing of Erlingbunigwe unfolding at Villa Park. Surely the easy peasy comes in the second-half?

[mcal]

...Haaland went missing at Villa Park, and get punished by a common Concacaf Jamaican player

[Coach]

Ordinary Villa Park, fewer touches than an agoraphobic at Kew Gardens. Easy peasy indeedy. Wilfred Ndidi. As foretold, sans Kevin De Through ball, it’s end of level bosses all round. Ordinary Ezri Konsa manhandling the Viking like Alfred in 871.

City have huge problems, said it a while back, the chance concession statistics are ridiculous. Villa 22 shots on goal, midfield more porous than Annabelle Chong’s, as for the big fella, holding the ball up with the panache of a perforated scrotum.

At the back Gvardiol looks the absolute antonym of the Gvardiol of Leipzig. Six foot plus of pusillanimity. How many errors leading to goals? Contest the header? More worried about disturbing the hair gel. Stand your ground? Why when the grass is gorgeously green and perfectly watered. The struggles are surreal, a top quality centrehalf invoking his inner Harry Maguire. City have massive problems.

Beloved must keep winning, unlike yesteryears, the Mesopotamians aren’t quite as super sayan. A double figure deficit will be a huge ask for this City side lest Guardiola plucks more genius from his prefrontal cortex.

[danfo driver]

...Haaland went missing at Villa Park, and get punished by a common Concacaf Jamaican player

The guy is an average striker! I have been saying it for a while and people doubted me! This is a player who is supposed to be top of the top, yet, he misses sitters like water! He played in Norway, Austria and Germany and was NEVER once anywhere close to being highest goalscorer. I always said the two top strikers for me right now are Osimhen and Mbappe - both hav dragged their teams to win titles.

What shocks me the most thought is how this average player came to England and dominated them! Destroyed all their records and is now the best striker to ever play there! I am shocked!

[txj]

Ordinary Villa Park, fewer touches than an agoraphobic at Kew Gardens. Easy peasy indeedy. Wilfred Ndidi. As foretold, sans Kevin De Through ball, it’s end of level bosses all round. Ordinary Ezri Konsa manhandling the Viking like Alfred in 871.

City have huge problems, said it a while back, the chance concession statistics are ridiculous. Villa 22 shots on goal, midfield more porous than Annabelle Chong’s, as for the big fella, holding the ball up with the panache of a perforated scrotum.

At the back Gvardiol looks the absolute antonym of the Gvardiol of Leipzig. Six foot plus of pusillanimity. How many errors leading to goals? Contest the header? More worried about disturbing the hair gel. Stand your ground? Why when the grass is gorgeously green and perfectly watered. The struggles are surreal, a top quality centrehalf invoking his inner Harry Maguire. City have massive problems.

Beloved must keep winning, unlike yesteryears, the Mesopotamians aren’t quite as super sayan. A double figure deficit will be a huge ask for this City side lest Guardiola plucks more genius from his prefrontal cortex.

I'll be careful not to overreact...City were minus some very key elements, and I don't simply refer to Rodri. Especially lacking was in the wide areas and crucially having to move Bernado out of CM which meant it was easier to press them...

[txj]

...Haaland went missing at Villa Park, and get punished by a common Concacaf Jamaican player

The guy is an average striker! I have been saying it for a while and people doubted me! This is a player who is supposed to be top of the top, yet, he misses sitters like water! He played in Norway, Austria and Germany and was NEVER once anywhere close to being highest goalscorer. I always said the two top strikers for me right now are Osimhen and Mbappe - both hav dragged their teams to win titles.

What shocks me the most thought is how this average player came to England and dominated them! Destroyed all their records and is now the best striker to ever play there! I am shocked!

Sounding like ohenhen

[danfo driver]

Ordinary Villa Park, fewer touches than an agoraphobic at Kew Gardens. Easy peasy indeedy. Wilfred Ndidi. As foretold, sans Kevin De Through ball, it’s end of level bosses all round. Ordinary Ezri Konsa manhandling the Viking like Alfred in 871.

City have huge problems, said it a while back, the chance concession statistics are ridiculous. Villa 22 shots on goal, midfield more porous than Annabelle Chong’s, as for the big fella, holding the ball up with the panache of a perforated scrotum.

At the back Gvardiol looks the absolute antonym of the Gvardiol of Leipzig. Six foot plus of pusillanimity. How many errors leading to goals? Contest the header? More worried about disturbing the hair gel. Stand your ground? Why when the grass is gorgeously green and perfectly watered. The struggles are surreal, a top quality centrehalf invoking his inner Harry Maguire. City have massive problems.

Beloved must keep winning, unlike yesteryears, the Mesopotamians aren’t quite as super sayan. A double figure deficit will be a huge ask for this City side lest Guardiola plucks more genius from his prefrontal cortex.

I'll be careful not to overreact...City were minus some very key elements, and I don't simply refer to Rodri. Especially lacking was in the wide areas and crucially having to move Bernado out of CM which meant it was easier to press them...

They forget that historically, City goes on overdrive after January. More so, the most interesting thing to me since August is that its so cute how they are so focused on City. Like literally, they think the league is Arsenal v City. And no one else exist. They are going to learn again very very hard.

[danfo driver]

...Haaland went missing at Villa Park, and get punished by a common Concacaf Jamaican player

The guy is an average striker! I have been saying it for a while and people doubted me! This is a player who is supposed to be top of the top, yet, he misses sitters like water! He played in Norway, Austria and Germany and was NEVER once anywhere close to being highest goalscorer. I always said the two top strikers for me right now are Osimhen and Mbappe - both hav dragged their teams to win titles.

What shocks me the most thought is how this average player came to England and dominated them! Destroyed all their records and is now the best striker to ever play there! I am shocked!

Sounding like ohenhen

[danfo driver]

The league is very weak. Easy Peasy!

[George Bush]

David + Goliath = Haaland!!!!!

[Coach]

Maupay 1-on-1 with Edison. Goal. Haaland 1-on-1 with Flekken. Por que? Levels. Ethan Pinnock having Norse meat for supper.

Gvardiol, struggling as usual.

[Mr. Piffington]

The young man just got back from injury, he's a bit rusty.

[airwolex]

Haaland is a great goal scorer oh. His all round game isn't on the level of Mbappe or even Osimhen but still a heack of a baller.

[packerland]

The league is very weak. Easy Peasy!

This is a false statement that is not backed up with facts. Emery has always been a good coach. He won the Europa Cup many times with ease. Too bad the soft players my Arsenal had back then were a jacka$$ to him due to his limited English.

As far as Haaland breaking all kinds of EPL scoring records, the guy scored goals in bunches and Red Bull and Dortmund. The difference now is that he has Pep as a coach and a bunch of playmakers left and right. Don’t let your hatred for English people (I can’t stand them too) cloud your judgement. The EPL is one of the best league in the world.